I stayed silent
Back in February of 2020 after Valentine’s Day. I met this guy on a chat room. He said his name was Christian in the photo he sent me he looked 17 he said he just looked older than he was, and stupidly I fell for it. He and I hit it off. I quickly fell in love with him and he made me feel special. I told him that I had some mental disorders cause at that point I trusted him and he said he had some too. I felt like I found my other half.
Things were good until one day we were sending flirty texts back and forth when he sent the unthinkable. He sent a picture of pornography from a girl. I was horrified and got so angry he made up all sorts of excuses and I learned that was his ex’s photo and that he was cheating on me with his ex. I was devastated. I learned he did this to all his girlfriends and he was involved in polygamy. I texted the girl to make sure she was alright but got the feeling that is was him on another number. He told me the pic was offline and I said that’s still not ok. I told him to delete it then I asked if he still had it 5 minutes later he said ya. I went off the hook.
He was saying I was overreacting and being dramatic. That this stuff was normal. I told him no it wasn’t. I saved the photo so I would have proof he was doing this and then I pretended I was in his state and wanted to talk face to face so he gave me the address of his school and told me “no cops baby or ill bring some guys to beat you” I remained calm I went for a walk and took my iPad and tried to dial 911 it wouldn’t work now looking back I’m sure he hacked my device and stopped it. And when I didn’t message him he would tell me he was going to kill me.
I told him we were over and he called me horrible things and unfriended me on snap I was relieved and I’m still trying to clear my head. Keep in mind this was only in a 4-5 day period of time. He also sent me photos of him in a gang getting caught by police and running.
I really do believe he intended to kill me. I got no justice. He got rid of all the evidence. I kept this secret from my parents for so long for like almost a year. I was scared that they wouldn’t believe me. But they stood with me. But told me that I can never tell anyone. They were so wrong. This is my story to tell not theirs. And plus they weren’t the first people I told. So ha! People need to know that this kind of thing is far from normal. And needs to be shared. I hope this story helps a survivor.
If you are a victim of sexual assault, or sexual harassment, please reach out to me! And share your story with me if you want to! I would love to be your supporter. I would love to know that I’m not alone.
This isn’t the first time I’ve been assaulted or harassed. There are many experiences. I will save them for another day if you guys want to hear it. I know this isn’t the last, I’ve experienced other scenarios since.
please leave a comment if you can! Reach out to me!